Bye Bye Bachmann
Michele Bachmann, legendary author of fictional American history and valiant advocate of praying away The Gay, is quitting the race for the Republican presidential nomination after 95 percent of the caucus-goers in her native Iowa chose last night not to rally to her noble cause.
Delusionary to the very end, Bachmann preposterously claimed in her DROPOUT SPEECH that her practice of politics has not made her a politician –which is like Hannibal Lecter saying that his peculiar epicurian tastes didn’t mean he was a cannibal.
“While a congresswoman by title, a politician I never have been, or will I ever hope to be,” she said.
That’s how ridiculous this woman can be.
It might turn out that Bachmann’s most enduring legacy will be an end to the ridiculous credence the mainstream media have accorded the Ames Straw Poll.
You remember the Ames Straw Poll, don’t you? It’s held every four years on the campus of Iowa State University, and it’s a monumental waste of time. But the media like to pretend that it’s important.
This past August, Bachmann won the Ames thingie, after which untold volumes of newsprint, air time and Internet bandwidth were devoted to silly notions that the Minnesota congresswoman had emerged as a major contender for the GOP presidential nomination.
But Bachmann finished sixth in last night’s Iowa caucuses, thereby demonstrating that the Ames Straw Poll was a harginger of nothing.
So, we owe you a vote of thanks for that, Michele — along with gratitude for the many laughs you’ve evoked along the campaign trail.
UPDATE: Meanwhile, Rick Perry has decided to STAY IN THE RACE.