Will critics of Obamacare demand a shutdown of UPS, FedEx and Target stores?
Charles Pierce NAILS IT:
My goodness, it’s been a terrible holiday season for those people who trumpet the flexibility and abiding genius of the Free Market over the clammy deadweight of Government. First of all, Target gets itself hacked to the point where just about everybody who’s shopped there since the day after Thanksgiving knows that all of their personal information is in the wind…
Given what has happened to Target, and following the rhetorical precedents set by opponents of the Affordable Care Act, I don’t believe we have any choice but to close every big box retailer in America, starting with Target, until every one of these systems is made error-free and impregnable, which of course the private sector can do because it does everything better than the public sector…until you discover that somebody in Kiev has bought $70,000 worth of herring and kutia on your MasterCard. Then it’s the government’s fault because freedom.
Then, just as we’re all waiting on our porches for the last of our Christmas packages to arrive, we recall that the people who have worked for two decades to chloroform the U.S. Postal Service always have assured us that the Private Sector, as personified by FedEx and UPS, would more than make up the slack when the clearly obsolete USPS goes out of business…
Again following the rhetorical precedents set in the debate over the Affordable Care Act, I think both FedEx and UPS should be shut down immediately because their systems were overwhelmed by a sudden demand. This was due to inexplicable “bad weather” in a season we like to call “winter” and due to an “extraordinary event.”
Which is so extraordinary that it has occurred on the very same day since at least 336 A.D.
I’m sure that, next year, FedEx and UPS will solve the mysteries that are winter and Christmas in time to demonstrate once again that the Private Sector does everything better than the public sector, or else will find a way that it is all the government’s fault because freedom.