B-O-N-U-S: The five letter cuss word

March 23rd, 2009 at 02:55pm Linda Grist Cunningham

One of the side benefits of all this economic implosion stuff is that Americans are getting a whopping, though confused, education in the fine art of high finance, investing, return on investments and assorted other boons and ills of a complicated global economy.

Take the cases of 401ks and bonuses.

I dare say that a year ago most working people had no idea what was going on inside their 401ks. Amazing how many employees did not know that their companies were matching with company stock and not with cash. Who knew or understood what it meant when the company paperwork said “we match 50 cents on the dollar in company stock”? I know a lot of folks who thought that meant they were getting two quarters to rub together, not a share or two of the company.

Dare I say it? It’s our fault. Our failure to engage meant when the company’s stock went south of the equator these past six-nine months, so did the 401k take an awful tumble. It wasn’t the company’s fault we didn’t read the paperwork and ignored the fact we could have moved that company stock match with a couple of keystrokes online. Solution: Open the statements. Open and manage your 401k online. But, for heaven sakes, stop blaming the “company” for your (our) failure to pay attention.

Now, for the bonus is a cuss word thing. I am as appalled as the next girl at the shockingly, jaw-droppingly, holes-in-their-souls, arrogant greediness displayed by the multi-bazillion-dollar execs at these major corporations. The ones with access to corporate jets, or friends with corporate jets. The ones whose take-home pay is 100 times their employees’ take home. The ones whose bonuses for a year could wipe out the combined deficits of Winnebago and Boone counties, plus all the towns and cities within.

Those ones. They ought to have to live on $50,000 a year (we’ll be generous), drive a 15-year-old car, do their own laundry and groceries, and generally live like a school teacher or a journalist for the rest of their lives. Sending them to jail would just cost me and you money. Let’s make ‘em live like we do.

But, that doesn’t mean we should be turning the “bonus” word into a cuss word. A bonus has a long, proud — and effective — history. One can earn a bonus for performance above and beyond the expected. One can earn a bonus as a percentage of the financial success of the company. One can earn a bonus as a “thank you” for a job well done, a task completed exceptionally, or, sometimes, just because the body of work over a period of time makes one invaluable. There are lots of good reasons bonuses should be paid.

I’m of the mind that some of the folks who are getting the bonuses we’re writing about actually did, indeed, earn them. It’s unfortunate that the holes-in-the-souls have created a new culture in which a bonus, any bonus, is suspect.

I can tell you this: If I had the cash to give bonuses to some of my folks, I would do so in a heart beat. They’ve earned them. I want them to stay here. I need them to stick around and work their magic. They are doing exceptional work under challenging circumstances. And, I wouldn’t be making them feel guilty for accepting them.(Disclosure: I have gotten bonuses; no more.)

Lessons learned: Read the fine print. Pay attention. Know what your money is doing and what you want it to do. If it’s too good to be true, it is. And, let’s toss our pitchforks where they belong: at the holes-in-souls, not at the folks working their butts off.

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